Category Archives: Ehlers Danlos Syndrome

Friday Feelings with My EDS Journey

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

This week I spoke to Emma from My EDS Journey. For a number of years Emma worked for a local charity helping people with disabilities but she has had to cut the number of hours that she can work dramatically as her condition, Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, has become unstable.

You can find Emma on Twitter, Facebook and Pinterest.

Miss clicky

“Hi everyone, my name is Emma I am 40 and I live in a very nice area of the south east of England. I suffer from hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (hEDS).  This affects me in a number of ways, but mainly mobility, gastric, autonomic and pain are my problem areas.

My biggest passion is singing and I absolutely love musical theatre but unfortunately at the moment due to my current condition singing lessons and theatre visits are on hold! I took up blogging about 6 months ago as an outlet to communicate with others in a similar position to me and so we can share our knowledge and experiences living with a chronic condition. You can find my blog at http://edsjour.blogspot.com/edsjour.blogspot.com

Now that we know a little a about Emma, let’s look at her Friday Feelings entry:

giphy

Dear Diary,

Today is Friday, with most people I expect looking forward to a busy and varied weekend and perhaps socialising or spending time with friends and family.  For me however, this evening will be the same as any other, curled up watching TV or listening to music while trying to get comfortable.

My energy levels are currently very low and I am going through a bad period with my EDS, I wonder what my next problem will be as something new is always cropping up!

I like to take each day as it comes and not think too far ahead as my health is unpredictable and thinking about the future is scary and uncertain.

Due to the nature of EDS and it mainly being invisible to others, a lot of people don’t understand how it affects us, they may say “you are looking better today” or “ you need to keep up your exercises” as though these words are a magical cure.

I only wish they could see what is going on in the inside and then they would understand the phrase “make our invisible visible”.

A big thank you to Emma for taking part in Friday Feelings and being so open with us. Can you relate to Emma and her feelings of uncertainty about the future? Let us know in the comments below!

Want to write your own Friday Feelings entry?

Send

A high res photo

A short paragraph about yourself

What illnesses you have

Your diary entry with the following topics in it:

It’s Friday, many people will go out tonight for a few sociable drinks with their friends. What do you do on a typical Friday night?
How are you feeling at this moment about your chronic illness?
How do you feel about the future in regards to your illness?
How do you feel about the way people view your illness?

and links to your blog and social media to hello@thezebramom.com

Be sure to put “Friday Feelings” in the subject bar.

Until Sunday,

 

Z.M

 

x

 

 

Ridiculous things that injure people with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

Havin’ a bit of fun today with this tongue in cheek article. I was just thinking about all the things that can potentially hurt me-that wouldn’t hurt a “normal person.” The list was pretty funny so I thought I’d share them with you. I try and see the funny side of my illness. Nothing like a bit of comic relief!

Breathing

Breathing is vital to our survival. However, many people with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome suffer from a condition called Costrochronditis. It kind of feels like your having a heart attack and can make breathing very painful.

Eating

Again vital to our survival and yet, many of us have serious trouble with eating. Eating the wrong thing can cause pretty horrible side effects such as Tachycardia. If you suffer from Mast Cell Activation Disorder (MCAD), something you have been previously been able to eat all of a sudden causes an allergic reaction. Then there’s  Gut/Bowel Dysmotility and Gastroparesis

Sleeping

Many people with EDS suffer from Chronic Fatigue. We will spend weeks sleeping like we are hibernating for the long night. Then there are weeks where we suffer with insomnia. Our sleep patterns tend to be all over the place and we tend to be night owls in general.

insomnia GIF

Drinking

I’m not talking specifically about alcohol here. No, even drinking a glass of water can cause issues. We do have difficulty swallowing so sometimes we will either cough and splutter while the water goes down. Then there are times when the water goes down the wrong way or even cause us to bloat so badly that we look pregnant. As for alcohol? Yeah….just no. Tachycardia, MCAD flare, nausea, vomiting, THE APOCALYPSE.

Moving

Moving is like an extreme sport to us. Even on our good days we are afraid to move for fear we might injure ourselves. We are clumsy AF so there’s a pretty solid chance we are going to walk into a wall/table, trip over ourselves or trip over literally nothing.

Exercise

laughing GIF.gif

Working

“God, it must be so great not having to work” *insert eye roll here* We would love to be able to work, some of us can and that’s brilliant for so many of us our working lives are over long before we even get our first grey hair. Being stuck at home is not all it’s cracked up to be, you know?

eyeroll GIF

Sex

Yep. Even sex can be detrimental to us Zebras. Ever dislocated a hip while having sex? Um…no…me neither…

Yawning

Yep, simply yawning can cause pain. Anybody with TMJ Dysfunction will know this.

You: “What was that?!”

Me: Oh just my jaw popping out of place.

You:

shock GIF

Stretching

You’ve finally managed to have a good night sleep, you wake up, have a lovely big stretch and then….POP, POP, POP, POP.

crispies gif.gif

Sneezing

See above.

Laughing

Side effects of laughing include:

Headaches

Dislocations/subluxations

Fatigue

Your funny bone may get tickled but it also might pop out of place.

Bathing

Yes, even bathing cause some pretty nasty symptoms such as our POTS and Hypotension to flare up. Do you really need to wash your hair today? Like, is it a special occasion?

faints giphy

Hobbies

I’m not talking about bungee jumping or horse riding here, people. I’m talking about sitting on your butt, watching TV and KNITTING. Yep, even knitting can cause an injury. Dislocated wrists will put you off knitting for life.

Taking our meds

Never mind the difficulty having to swallow giant pills or multiple pills. Most of us can do that dry after awhile but when the side effects make you feel worse than the symptoms you are actually treating, you know you have a problem.

The weather

Is it hot and humid? Pain in the muscles. Cold? Pain in the joints.

Have anything to add to my list? Let me know below!

Until next time,

Z.M

x

Don’t forget to follow me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and Pinterest!

 

The Zebra Mom Trials-Oska Pulse

I have been given this product as part of a product review through the Chronic Illness Bloggers network. Although the product was a gift, all opinions in this review remain my own and I was in no way influenced by the company.

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

I contacted Oska Wellness a few months back as I had heard about the Oska Pulse and had seen some reviews. I’ll be honest, I was skeptical. But, my curiosity and desperation got the better of me so I made contact with Steve Collins one of the founders of Oska Wellness. He requested a Skype call and what a call it was! I felt as though I was talking to a friend, we spoke about music, Ireland and his family heritage. We spoke about the device and I was carefully hopeful after hearing about some of Steve’s stories. Steve told me “be skeptical, but don’t be surprised if it works. You won’t even realise it’s working, one day you’ll find you’re doing something you haven’t been able to do for a long time”.

So, what is the Oska Pulse?

According to oskawellness.com:

“Oska Pulse mimics the body’s own recovery processes to relieve pain, muscle stiffness and inflammation, using optimized pulsed electromagnetic field technology (PEMF) to encourage recovery at a cellular level.” It is a first grade, FDA approved medical device.

What are Electro Magenetic Fields?

Sounds a bit Star Trek, right? Ok, so I’ll break it down a bit.

So first of all, I think it’s important to know what electromagnetic fields are and how important they are to our survival.

The Earth has it’s own electromagnetic field and without it, we wouldn’t be here. The Earth’s magnetosphere is a shield that protects us from the powerful solar winds given off by our sun. Without it, our atmosphere would be blown away out into space.

We all use this technology on a day to day basis. Our phones, microwaves and computer screens all emit electromagnetic fields.

So how does this technology work as a therapy?

PEMF therapy is applied by running an electrical current through a copper coil which creates an electromagnetic field.

This type of therapy is said to improve circulation. With improved circulation, your cells are in a much better condition allowing your body to heal more effectively.

Electromagnetic field therapy has been in use since the invention of electricity. It was widely adopted in East and Western Europe but its use was restricted to animals in North America until recently. Veterinarians became the first health professionals to use PEMF therapy, usually to heal broken legs in racehorses.

In 2004, a pulsed electromagnetic field system was approved by the FDA as an adjunct to cervical fusion surgery in patients at high risk for non-fusion. 

Although electricity’s potential to aid bone healing was reported as early as 1841, it was not until the mid-1950s that scientists seriously studied the subject.

Ok sounds great, right? But if you’re like me, you’ll want some hard core proof this technology works. So I did a bit of reading about PEMF. I read some articles and reviews and it gave me hope but, I was still a bit skeptical about whether it would work for Ehlers Danlos Syndrome. After all, it’s been noted as one of the most painful conditions.

So it arrived after a couple of weeks. I charged it for awhile and used it that evening. My science fanatic husband used an EMF detector on the device and sure enough, the Oska Puse was emitting electromagnetic pulses every few seconds.

A few weeks later my husband was refilling my Pill Drill and he called into me ” Babe?! You know you haven’t been taking your painkillers, right?”

I stopped and thought about it. Lo and behold I realised I was only taking two Tramadol in the morning. I had previously been taking the max dose (400mg per day).

I upped my use of the Oska to see if it would help my Dysautonomia symptoms as Steve had told me  a young woman with POTS had noticed an improvement with her symptoms. Once I upped my usage, I did notice a difference with my POTS symptoms.

The Zebra Mom Trials

So how do you use the Oska Pulse?

Please note that if you have a pace maker or internal defibrillator you will not be able to use the Oska Pulse.

The device is about as small as a phone and can easily fit into a pocket or handbag. A strap also comes in the package so you can simply strap it on to you as you get on with your day. I use mine first thing in the morning for an hour. I use it again in the afternoon for about 2 hours and then finally another 2 hours in the evening. You can use it while on the computer working, reading a book or even making the dinner.

Skeptics might say this device is producing a placebo effect but we were both skeptical from the beginning. I  went to my pain specialist just last week and told him about the Oska Pulse. He was in absolute agreement that this technology works and he was not surprised at all that the device was working for my chronic pain. This pain specialist has an amazing reputation and is highly regarded in his field here in Ireland so for him to believe in this product and technology, it says a lot. I know this isn’t a placebo effect.

I’m now thinking about possibly working outside of the home, something I haven’t done since 2012. I’m pushing my daughter on the swing and playing hide and seek with the kids. My day to day pain has all but vanished.

Now, of course no tablet or device is going to stop me from dislocating and stop the pain that goes with it. But knowing that the horrible day to day excruciating pain that I normally experience is not going to stop me from living my life, has given me hope. Once I start getting my injections into my hips and spine, I should hopefully be in a position to throw myself into physiotherapy. Getting myself strong should reduce dislocations so between the Oska Pulse, injections and physiotherapy, I will hopefully be able to go back to the old Evie who danced, played tennis, went horse riding and a social life.

The Oska Pulse has put in me in a position to start my recovery. I can start seeing the light between the trees. Not using pain killers has also made me feel more clear headed and the rebound pain I often get from using Tramadol has disappeared. Using Tramadol over a long period of time can have a number of pretty nasty side effects which I started noticing.

If you are like me living with chronic pain that has stopped you living your life, you should definitely try the Oska Pulse. You have nothing to loose. Oska Wellness offers a 90 day money back guarantee so if it doesn’t work for you, you can simply send it back.

Product rating: 5/5

If you would like to try the Oska Pulse and receive a $55 discount click the link here. Or you can use the coupon code 180387 at the checkout! For more information, see the Oska Wellness Facebook page.

Further reading:

http://www.news-medical.net/news/20170613/Clinical-study-suggests-Oska-Pulse-as-effective-method-to-reduce-pain.aspx

Pulsed Electromagnetic Field Therapy – Dr. Kathy Davis, PhD – May2017

OSKA-PainJournal with tables – no logo

Next time I’ll be reviewing the Pill Drill I mentioned above.

Until then,

Z.M

x

Don’t forget to follow me on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and Pinterest!

SaveSave

Friday Feelings with Zebra Writes

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

This week I spoke to Sara from zebrawrites.com. In a previous life, Sara worked as a school psychologist and now she works part-time as a behavioural therapist. Sara writes about her experiences on her blog.

Sara’s primary diagnosis is Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (hEDS). You can find Sara on Facebook and Twitter.

Sara

 

Now that we know a little about Sara, let’s have a look at her Friday Feelings entry:

giphy

“Dear Diary

Fridays are hard for me because I am very tired by the end of the week, especially if I have been working. I most often spend Friday evenings at home, enjoying the company of my pets and my husband. I prefer to meet up with friends on a Saturday or Sunday during the daytime, in a quiet place. My intractable migraine make me extremely sensitive to light, noise, and smell – so I have basically given up on attending parties or visiting bars during prime hours. When I’m feeling particularly well I do enjoy playing trivia with friends at a local bar on a weeknight (when it is quieter).

At this moment I feel both hopeful and frustrated. I am still young, and there is so much that I want to do with my life.

I want to be a mother in the future, and I hope that I will have the energy to be a good one – but I know that sometimes I will fall short of my expectations for myself – in this and other endeavors because of the limitations that my illness imposes on me. I have hope that new medications that are on the horizon may be able to control my daily migraine pain, but also am tired of waiting. I worry that my body will continue deteriorate. In the meantime I’m learning to sit with the pain and be as functional as possible while enduring it. I’m doing my best to strengthen my body with physical therapy. I hope that it will be enough.

I think that people have difficulty understanding chronic illness unless they have experienced it for themselves. It is hard to understand the fluctuating nature of our pain and level disability or ability on any given day. I also think it’s difficult for people to understand a condition for which there is no cure or finite ending.

EDS is not (likely) going to kill me, but it’s also never going to go away. It is a part of who I am. When confronted with this fact, most people want to “fix” it, or come up with a solution.

They might offer unsolicited advice, or suggest you’re not taking care of yourself well enough in order to ease the discomfort our condition makes them feel. I know that they mean well, they really do. So if you are a person with a chronic illness I challenge you to educate others about your life, and what it is really like. If you are a person who knows someone with a chronic illness, I challenge you to quit trying to “fix” it for them, and ask them about their experiences and true feelings.”

Thanks to Sara for taking part in our Friday Feelings blog. Can you relate to Sara’s story? Do you get unsolicited advice? How do you deal with it? Let us know in the comments below!

Want to write your own Friday Feeling entry?

Send

A high res photo

A short paragraph about yourself

What illnesses you have

Your diary entry with the following topics in it:

It’s Friday, many people will go out tonight for a few sociable drinks with their friends. What do you do on a typical Friday night?
How are you feeling at this moment about your chronic illness?
How do you feel about the future in regards to your illness?
How do you feel about the way people view your illness?

and links to your blog and social media to evienevin87@yahoo.ie

Be sure to put “Friday Feelings” in the subject bar.

Until Sunday,

Z.M

x

 

 

 

Friday Feelings with Pain Pals Blog

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

As it is Ehlers Danlos Syndrome Awareness Month, during the course of May, we will be reading the diary entries of EDS sufferers. Each person experiences their illness differently and I think it will be interesting to see these differences throughout the month.

This week I spoke to Claire from Pain Pals Blog. The mum of two previously worked in health care but medically retired nine years ago. She now works in the education system and enjoys Spoonie friendly hobbies.

Claire was diagnosed with hypermobile EDS at 42. She also suffers from migraines; dysautonomia/POTS, chronic nerve pain, gut problems, Raynauds, neurogenic
bladder and reactive depression. You can find Claire on Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram. 
EDS - Claire pic 

“Hi, I’m Claire. I am a married mum of 2 boys aged 21 and 18, and a girl aged 14 living on borders of South London & Surrey, UK. My career was nursing and I trained and worked in various London hospitals, and then worked as a palliative care nurse in a local hospice – a fantastic, rewarding job that I loved. I was medically retired 9 years ago when my back gave up on me. Now I am kept busy with the family (more needy as young adults than they were as toddlers). 

I am a school governor at a local primary school, and I am about to become Chair of my old school’s friends’ committee. We keep old pupils in touch as well as arranging careers events for current pupils. I love meeting new people and interacting with the pupils at both schools. I love reading and belong to several book clubs, posting reviews on the blog, and when I can get there I love the cinema and streamed theatre live events.”

So now that we know a little about Claire, let’s have a read of her Friday Feelings entry.

giphy

“Dear Diary,

It’s Friday, many people will go out tonight for a few sociable drinks with their friends. On a typical Friday night I will usually be found curled up in my PJs! How much of the evening meal I help with really depends upon what sort of day I have had and how fatigued I am. These days my hubby, Duncan is based at home with me, and in theory the kids can take over the kitchen duties but, it is usually like Piccadilly Circus as they come and go, leaving us to keep pace with who is eating or not! Some weeks I will try to join in with Spoonie Speak – a chat set up on Twitter for those of us who can’t go out, but like a chat in our PJs. Like lots of spoonies Netflix, Amazon & TV play a big part in my life but, this week I am actually going out on Friday for the leaving dinner of the current Chair of the friends committee.

I really want to go but do get a bit anxious about making arrangements in case I have a bad day, can’t go and let others down. Not to mention missing out.

My physical health has really deteriorated recently and since having a spinal cord stimulator implanted for the chronic pain, my POTS symptoms have really gone mad. I feel frustrated, tired and worn down  by the constant pain, fainting, dislocations, drug side effects, losing my independence, the uncertainty of how I will be from hour to hour and struggling to make plans. Something I really struggle with is the fatigue and the subsequent guilt at needing to rest. On a beautiful day I can’t stand not being to jump up and just go for a walk in the park.

Some days I feel like I am constantly saying sorry for needing help to have a shower, for fainting, for being unable to cook, for being pushed in the wheelchair, even for not being able to lift the iron.

I try not to think too hard about the future for me – on bad days I can’t think about living with the pain, particularly the chronic back and leg pain, for another week let alone another 40 years! Sounds dramatic but that is how it feels. I also know that there is very little that can be done for the extreme joint pain – I have been told I need shoulder and hip replacements, but that it isn’t possible because of the dislocations and I’m still too young.

I don’t want to “give in” to the illness any more than I have to. Sometimes this is easier said than done – and at times the future feels uncertain.

But I do tend to do what I can when I can and probably don’t pace. I want to keep as active as I can for as long as I can, but the severity of POTS symptoms this last 6 months has left me feeling really low and really ill. Hopefully the different consultants can sort me enough to get me back on an even keel – but the lack of “shared” care is frustrating; repeating the same story over and over, no one knowing what other specialities are doing!

What does worry me for the future is the kids – the younger two anyway. The 18 year old has bad and frequent migraines, with neck pain, hand and arm pain. The youngest is now subluxating and dislocating, has daily pain in joints, can’t hold a pen in a normal grip, writes slowly and has pain. All 3 are dizzy on standing and lose vision – and all three are overly anxious. Two have had counselling, one self harms, one is on anti depressants, we are well acquainted with CAMHS!

I do accept that hardly anyone will have heard of EDS and have got used to suggestions of having collagen injections but what is tougher is the lack of understanding about what chronic illness means. No, I won’t get better. It is genetic so no there is no cure, not even for the kids! I feel that I have to justify myself for being tired, cancelling plans, etc. I hate having to ask for help and would love it if friends would just remember that I can no longer drive and offer a lift without me having to ask. Some people can’t understand why I use a wheelchair when I can stand and walk – pain is invisible, as are the implants in my back, and damage to my joints, but these are what making standing up and walking a near impossibility some days. I feel that other people’s lives are so busy and that I should be fitting in with them, after all I’m at home all day.

It is frustrating when I’m told how well I look and this happens when I’ve put on some lippie and blusher.

You don’t see me at my worst because I can’t actually get out of the house then! But I would probably rather people think I’m putting best foot forward and being positive – chronic illness doesn’t stop you wanting to look good, go out, have a laugh; even if you can’t always actually do this.”

 A big thank you to Claire for taking part in Friday Feelings and being so open with us. Can you relate to Claire? Do you feel guilty not being able to perform certain tasks? Let us know in the comments below!

 Want to write your own Friday Feeling entry?

Send

A high res photo

A short paragraph about yourself

What illnesses you have

Your diary entry with the following topics in it:

It’s Friday, many people will go out tonight for a few sociable drinks with their friends. What do you do on a typical Friday night?
How are you feeling at this moment about your chronic illness?
How do you feel about the future in regards to your illness?
How do you feel about the way people view your illness?

and links to your blog and social media to evienevin87@yahoo.ie

Be sure to put “Friday Feelings” in the subject bar.

Until Sunday,

Z.M

x

 

Friday Feelings with Hospital Princess

Hey there, hi there, ho there! Apologies for the radio silence and the delay in posting this week’s Friday Feelings guest post. I’ve had a crazy few weeks which I will explain in due course.

As it is Ehlers Danlos Syndrome Awareness Month, during the course of May, we will be reading the diary entries of EDS sufferers. Each person experiences their illness differently and I think it will be interesting to see these differences throughout the month.

This week I spoke to Cheyenne from Hospital Princess. The 20-year-old is currently studying in college. Her goal is to become a Christian counsellor and to specialise in chronic and terminal illnesses. Cheyenne suffers from Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, Mast Cell Activation Disorder, Dysautonomia and Gastroparesis. You can find Cheyenne on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, YouTube and even on Etsy!

Cheyanne

“My name is Cheyanne. I am 20 years old. South Carolina is my is currently home; however, my heart is native to sunny Florida. I am blessedto do life with my family, wonderful partner of four years, and my red-headed smushed faced cat named Weasley. I am a college student at North Greenville University. 

Chances are, I always have a book or Kindle in my hands. Vegan baking for others, despite being tube fed unable to eat, is another enjoyablepastime. Similar to most, social media, binge watching Netflix or Hulu, and technology all consume a large chunk of my leisure time. And I recently transformed my grandma-like hobbies of knitting and sewing into a mini Etsy business selling handmade items.”

So now that we know a little about Cheyanne, let’s have a read of her Friday Feelings entry.

giphy

“Dear Diary,

It’s Friday, many people will go out tonight for a few sociable drinks with their friends. My weekend with chronic illness involves the total opposite of the drunken, wild parties usually experienced by other college twenty-somethings. Alcohol via a J tube is never a practical idea. Instead, my Friday nights are spent with family and close friends playing board games, chatting, binge watching Netflix, or even the odd spur of the moment road trip.

I feel kind of defeated in terms of my illness. Treatment is limited. Since I am already relying on last resort options like tube feedings, TPN (IV Nutrition), and a continuous infusion of IV Benadryl for Mast Cell Disease, it is as if I am perpetually trapped in the ‘what do I do now’ stage. There is hope for better days ahead though.

The future is obscure, clouded with the unknowns of chronic illness.

I have no clue what the future holds, nor will I try to pretend that I do. Any conceivable plan I have had for the future has not resulted in the outcome I ever expected. Overall, I am thankful for each day I have left to continue to pursue God’s will for my life.

Outsiders inevitably have a different perspective towards my illness. The diagnoses are tremendously misunderstood.

Because they are mostly ‘invisible’ illnesses, people neglect to consider how widespread the symptoms actually are.

Only awareness can reduce the stigma and make others recognize the seriousness of Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, Mast Cell Disease, and the remaining comorbid conditions.”

A big thank you to Cheyenne for taking part in our Friday Feelings blog.

 Want to write your own Friday Feeling entry?

Send

A high res photo

A short paragraph about yourself

What illnesses you have

Your diary entry with the following topics in it:

It’s Friday, many people will go out tonight for a few sociable drinks with their friends. What do you do on a typical Friday night?
How are you feeling at this moment about your chronic illness?
How do you feel about the future in regards to your illness?
How do you feel about the way people view your illness?

and links to your blog and social media to evienevin87@yahoo.ie

Be sure to put “Friday Feelings” in the subject bar.

Until tomorrow,

Z.M

x

How ‘attachment parenting’ helped me with my chronic illness

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

Soon I’ll be back to London for my next round of tests and physiotherapy. The smallies will also be seeing their paediatric physio in the Hypermobility Unit in London. Going abroad with small children can be so stressful and takes up so many of your spoons. I remember with Alex, everywhere we went, even for a short trip to the city we had a truck load of things to bring with us. This time with Olivia it is so much easier because my parenting technique is so different.

Attachment Parenting&Chronic Illness

So what is “Attachment Parenting”?

Well, for me I just call it parenting, it’s the biological norm to raise a child so I hate putting a label on it.

According to parenting science.com:

“Attachment parenting” is an approach to child-rearing intended to forge strong, secure attachments between parents and children.”

Attachment Parenting is often referred to as AP.

But how does AP differ from any other type of parenting?

AP is associated with a number of practices, including:

Baby-carrying or “baby-wearing”
Breastfeeding on cue
Nurturing touch (including skin-to-skin “kangaroo care” for infants)
Being responsive to a baby’s cries
Being sensitive and responsive to a child’s emotions (e.g., by helping her cope with nighttime fears)
Co-sleeping

In addition, attachment parenting advocates often promote “positive parenting,” an approach to discipline that attempts to guide children by emotion coaching, reasoning, and constructive problem solving.

However, proponents of AP–like William and Martha Sears, who coined the term “attachment parenting”–note that there is no checklist of rules that parents must follow to qualify as “attachment parents” (Sears and Sears 2001).

Family circumstances may prevent parents from carrying out every AP practice. What’s really important, argues these authors, is sensitive, responsive parenting-— understanding and addressing your child’s needs in an affectionate way.

Similarly, the founders of Attachment Parenting International argue that that attachment parenting is really about adapting a few general principles–like providing kids with a consistent, loving, primary caregiver–to the particular needs of your family.

This is not the same as being overly-protective. By definition, securely-attached kids are not overly clingy or helpless. They are the kids who feel confident to explore the world on their own. They can do this because they trust that their parents will be there for them (Mercer 2006).

So how has AP practices helped me with my chronic illness?

Babywearing

When I was pregnant my Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome wreaked havoc on my body. I was wheelchair bound by 5 weeks into my pregnancy because I developed severe Symphysis Pubis Disorder (SPD)  and my Autonomic System was all over the place.

I knew that there was a pretty good chance that I would still be affected with the SPD post partum and I was right. Two years on and I still suffer with it. How was I going to push a buggy while in a wheelchair?

Babywearing was my answer. Even on days where I couldn’t wear Ollie for whatever reason, Daddy wore her. It was a lovely way for them to bond. While I liked my ring sling, he was more into the wrap type slings. My coordination couldn’t handle the wrapping at all.

Three months after her birth, I didn’t need the wheelchair as frequently but I still carried her. I knew that I wouldn’t be able to manage lifting and opening up a heavy buggy so just popping my sling into my bag was the easiest option. After the ring sling I opted for the Rock n Rolla Fidella buckle carrier it was badass. Then I switched to a beautiful pink Fidella Mei Tai before going back to a buckle carrier (Nova) as my shoulder became to sore for wrapping. The Nova hasn’t had much use as Ollie likes to walk but I do use it for when I need walk to collect Alex from school or when we are in London. We brought a stroller on holiday once and it went unused, plus it is a pain having to bring it along with the other luggage.

Me sling

In retrospect, I wish I had gone along to a babywearing group to try things out before I bought the Mei Tai. It was only after I rented a Nova from the group that I realised it was exactly what I needed, lightweight, breathable and tidy enough to go in my bag. I would absolutely recommend people to try before they buy.

Babywearing allows you to be hands free as well and baby sleeps contently snuggled into their parents chest.

Marty fence BW

It really is a win/win situation. Baby is happy therefore Mommy is happy.

I can imagine people who are unfamiliar with babywearing wondering how I possibly managed to carry extra weight with weak joints/muscles and pain.

If you’re wearing your baby correctly, you should be well supported and you shouldn’t feel the extra weight bearing down on you.

0532aca066939dca1b8e3ca8d2c6499f

Interestingly, I was sent a link to a blog called Babywearing with Disabilities recently. Until I began writing this post, I hadn’t opened it. Imagine my surprise to find out the woman who wrote the blog actually has hEDS too! She offers some very good advice about how to babywear when you’re disabled. Really worth a read. Further reading about the general benefits of babywearing for parent and baby can be found here.

Slings come in so many gorgeous prints and designs. Say goodbye to your shoe/handbag addiction and say hello to telling your other half “Oh I won that on a dip.”

Marty Ollie

Breastfeeding on demand

Sadly due to poor support and advice, Alex was only breastfed for just over two weeks. He had an undiagnosed tongue tie which caused me to be in a lot of pain when feeding him. Yet no healthcare professional said anything bar “it happens”. No. Breastfeeding should not hurt. That’s a different story that you can read about here.

Anyway, I remember being so exhausted when we switched to formula. Having to make up bottles in the middle of the night, dealing with reflux and constipation, the usual drama with formula was just so much hassle. Even with two of us taking turns to get up. I was also pretty annoyed that the weight that had been falling off me for the first two weeks stopped melting off me.

Luckily, armed with evidence based information and a fantastic network of breastfeeding mothers, I was determined that this time it would work out. It’s crazy the amount of misinformation being spread not just by ill informed loved ones but by actual health care professionals too. I actually interviewed one of Ireland’s leading IBCLCs and the world renowned, Dr Jack Newman about breastfeeding myths.

Anyway, unlucky for us, Ollie was also born with a tongue and lip tie. But, this time I was determined to get it sorted as quickly as possible so that we could continue our breastfeeding journey. After exclusively pumping for 3 weeks and then pumping while also    learning the skill of breastfeeding, we were on our way. Ollie is just two weeks shy of two and honestly, feeding her has been one of my greatest achievements as a parent. Breastfeeding is the biological norm but in Ireland where just 2% of babies are fed by 1 year, it’s a pretty big deal to even get to two years.

Breastfeeding forced me to relax and properly recover after the birth which in itself was pretty traumatic. I had to give birth early as my waters had broken. I ended up loosing half of my blood but the consultant managed to stop the bleeding just as they were calling for blood bags. I was very weak and ill after the birth so lying on the couch for the first 2 months while Ollie built up my supply was ideal. I didn’t have to get up in the night to make bottles and the lovely hormones released during feeding time helped me feel content and loved up. Plus with the extra hand it meant Alex could join in on the cuddles.

BF OA

Breastfeeding also meant that I didn’t have to bring a huge bag filled with bottles and powder everywhere we went. You literally just have your breasts and you grab a nappy and off you go. Babywearing while breastfeeding also meant that I could get on with whatever I needed to do while baby was getting everything she desired; being close to mama and her milk. Best part is that my meds are all compatible with breastfeeding as 99% of medications are, again unfortunately that is another piece of information that isn’t well known amongst a lot of healthcare professionals and new mothers.

You can read more about breastfeeding while being chronically ill here.

Cosleeping/Bedsharing

safe_sleep_7_leaflet-page-001

We intended to have Ollie sleep in a cosleep cot that Daddy made following this hack. FYI total cost was 65 Euro in comparison to the phenomenal amount of money you spend on a store bought cosleeper crib! The new mattress was the most expensive part.

Anyway, so we had the cosleeper cot attached to our bed and by the looks of it, Ollie would fit into it until she was at least four! Well, nope, this happened:

cosleeper

You know what? It worked out for the best because having her closer to me meant she could feed as I drifted back to sleep and it became a place to keep all her clothes and cloth nappies! Now she is able to undress me and help herself while I stay asleep! Research shows that parents who bed share and breastfeed get more sleep than those who don’t.

Once you practice the safety guidelines, there is virtually no risk in bed sharing, in fact a lot of research shows that babies who are exclusively breastfed and bed share with their mothers are actually less likely to die from SIDS. You only have to look at every other species of mammal to see that the dyad sleeping together is a natural part of child rearing. Hey, the Gruffalos cosleep too!

997034-the-gruffalos-child

You can find some evidence based articles about infant sleep and bed sharing here.

As stated before, AP doesn’t have to be all or nothing. You can formula feed and babywear, you can breastfeed and use a buggy. I just know from my own experience that following my mammalian instincts has helped me to cope with parenting while having a chronic illness a whole lot easier.

Until next time,

Z.M

x

 

Friday Feelings with The Zebra Mom

Hey there, hi there, ho there,

This week I didn’t have any guest post submitted so, I decided to do a Friday Feelings post myself.

Usually I explain what my guests suffer from and a they tell us a little about themselves but I’m sure anyone who follows my blog is well aware of my conditions and the things I am passionate about. I will take the oppurtunity to plug my social medias though :p You can find me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram and Snapchat (see the snap code in the header)

evie blog

So we will just dive straight into this week’s Friday Feelings post

 

giphy

“Dear Diary,

It’s Friday and for once, I’ve had an excellent night’s sleep and I’m feeling relatively OK. Usually I wake with something wrong but luckily, I have no more pain that the usual aches. I am so happy that I’m feeling well as can be since I am celebrating my 30th birthday tonight with family and friends. It is not often I get to socialise and get dressed up so when it does happen I appreciate it so much. I’ll probably run low on spoons after I finish getting myself ready but I am hoping the adrenaline will kick in and help me enjoy my night. I also have to be weary of certain lighting in pubs as my sensory issues can cause havoc when I do get the chance to go out. My typical Friday nights are usually much more boring. I sit at home and spend my time watching the Gilmore Girls or socialise on Facebook.

Even though I feel OK right now the last few weeks my EDS and Dysautonomia has been acting up a good bit forcing me to use my wheelchair. I hate using it, it makes me feel very self-conscious but I know I would be much worse off if I didn’t use it. Yesterday we went into the city to take our little boy shopping for new party clothes and if I didn’t have my chair, I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy our time. It’s a frustrating time for us at the moment as we are currently fundraising to get back to London for treatment. This 5-night trip is costing us 5,000 Euro. Luckily I have some really good friends and family who helped us raise 765 Euro a couple of days ago at our coffee morning. We couldn’t believe that that amount was raised in just a couple of hours! The community really came together to support us. I was truly blown away.

The future is uncertain but I am hopeful that getting treatment in London will give the children and me a fighting chance at some normality. I am having Autonomic tests in London to find out exactly which type of Dysautonomia I have. Here in Ireland I have been diagnosed with Orthostatic Intolerance and Vasovagal Syncope but the experts in London believe I have Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (PoTS). They believe Alexander also has PoTS but luckily he isn’t greatly affected. I also see symptoms in Olivia too.

I think as time goes on, people are understanding our conditions better and know that they are invisible illnesses and that some days I need my wheelchair and some days I don’t. I think the fact that we have had to go to the UK and fundraise thousands made people realise the severity of our conditions. It’s a shame that it has had to come down to this but I am content that those nearest and dearest to us take things seriously. I have had negative experiences with the way people has viewed EDS before. One doctor said that people with EDS didn’t suffer from chronic pain (I know, I know) and that I more likely had Fibromyalgia. Now, many experts do believe that most people diagnosed with Fibro have actually been misdiagnosed and that they actually have some form of Connective Tissue Disorder. I told her this and she was most unimpressed to be challenged. Pregnant and wheelchair bound, I left that appointment in tears in pure anger and frustration. A Rheumatologist diagnosed me with hEDS at that point but I saw another one to confirm the diagnosis because I felt the private consultant’s diagnosis wasn’t being taken seriously. I had the diagnosis confirmed by two experts in London so I am pretty confident hEDS is the right fit but I am going to have genetic testing just to be sure as I do fit a couple of the types of EDS too. I think anyone diagnosed with hEDS should have genetic testing to rule out other types and other Connective Tissue Disorders. If the tests come back clear, I’ll be happy sticking with the hEDS diagnosis.

Anyway, better start getting ready for my hair appointment and party. Wish me luck that my EDS or Dysautonomia doesn’t kick off!”

Want to write your own Friday Feeling entry?

Send

A high res photo

A short paragraph about yourself

What illnesses you have

Your diary entry with the following topics in it:

It’s Friday, many people will go out tonight for a few sociable drinks with their friends. What do you do on a typical Friday night?
How are you feeling at this moment about your chronic illness?
How do you feel about the future in regards to your illness?
How do you feel about the way people view your illness?

and links to your blog and social media to evienevin87@yahoo.ie

Be sure to put “Friday Feelings” in the subject bar.

Till Sunday,

Z.M

x

 

 

 

 

My Guide to Dysautonomia featured on Irish Dysautonomia Awareness

dysfordummies

Hey, there, hi there, ho there!

This week I guest blogged on Irish Dysautonomia Awareness with my Guide to Dysautonomia. Go check it out!

I’m putting together an e-book of all my guides of conditions relating to invisible illnesses. Want you illness included? Comment below!

Until friday,

Z.M

x

Irish Dysautonomia Awareness

I’m Evie and I come from Cork, Ireland. I’m a 29-year-old mother of two baby zebras. Alex is 7 and Olivia is almost 2. I am diagnosed with Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (hEDS), Orthostatic Intolerance and Vasovagal Syncope. I first heard of EDS after interviewing a young woman with EDS for the paper I used to work for. Something about this woman’s story stirred something inside me and I became passionate about raising awareness of the condition. A year later I was diagnosed with EDS. When I’m not blogging, looking after my two children or lying in bed ill, I help my husband run our wedding videography business and co-host a radio show on Saturday evenings from 7pm (Irish time) on www.clonlineradio.com.

evie blog

I write about Ehlers Danlos Syndrome an awful lot and with where I am guest posting today, I decided to focus on Dysautonomia. I recently wrote A Simple…

View original post 1,780 more words

Friday Feelings with Irish Dysautonomia Awareness

Hey there, hi there, ho there!

This week I spoke to Lette from Irish Dysautonomia Awareness. Lette suffers from Hypermobile Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (hEDS) , Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS) , Sphincter of Oddi Dysfunction (SOD), Neurogenic Bladder Dysfunction and Gut Dysmotility, to name but a few of her conditions. You can find Lette on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram.

Lette
Lette and her baby, Boo.

Hi I’m Lette. When I’m am able for it I love to play retro video games, photography, drawing, craft, listen to music. I like to internet hop and watch shows like Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, The Expanse and Black Sails with my wonderful husband and our little dog Boo.

So now we know a little about Lette, let’s have a read of her Friday Feelings entry.

giphy

“Dear Diary…

It’s another Friday, they have begun to all feel the same these days, days melting into weeks, melting into months that float by me at high speed and I still seem to be stuck here in my bed, in a dark room, feeling putrid!

Motivation seems to have upped and all but disappeared. I think of all the things I have achieved throughout my life before I got very sick and everything went downhill in 2011. I got my art degree, my Masters of science, worked as a fitness instructor, (can you imagine?) as a wedding and events photographer and videographer, as a teacher in adult education and as a lecturer in third level. That was just education and work, when I had the proper use of my legs and body, my husband and I used to just love going hiking through the wild woods and lakes of Killarney with the dog and cameras in toe, I loved to drive and cycle and swim and walk aimlessly through fields for hours with the camera just because I could and I felt immense joy in looking back at and sometimes editing the photos and the memories I had captured while out.

I used to love drawing, animals especially and now it has been so long since I lost myself in any art. I forget what it’s like and I miss it but the energy is never there in recent times for me to act on that longing.

I don’t do any of these things anymore, I find I am spending more and more time in bed as I am just not capable, the majority of the time, of being upright. Either I am in severe pain with my gut issues or severe pain in my hips and shoulder joints, or the worst pain at the moment is coming from the back of my head / base of my skull / top of my neck pain which causes white blinding headaches where I can do nothing but lie in a dark room and moan. No phone, no laptop, no reading, no entertainment. Just darkness and constant pain and nausea or POTS issues where my blood pressure is so low I can hardly turn over in the bed. It wears you down.

The only time I get out these days is not to visit friends or family like I used to regularly do, but instead to go to hospital and consultant appointments and even then I have to reschedule many because I am too ill to go!

I’m getting gloomy but I don’t mean to be, because something different happened yesterday. I had to update the house insurance! What? Bear with me! Honestly, it gave me a sense of purpose, for all of those 15 or so minutes I had something, relatively important, to do and it felt good!

This morning I helped make the breakfast with the husband, put laundry washing on, picked up the Nintendo DS for the first time in ages and played Earthbound and I even had a shower. This may sound utterly silly, but to me, these are huge achievements! The shower is a funny one, I actually have to way up my energy for the day against the effort of a shower and believe me, I may not have the energy for days. It can get a tad funkay in fairness!

So while many friends of mine will be going out on the town later tonight or this weekend and I know a few others who are jetting off on a few days holidays in Europe, all I can achieve is having a freshly washed dressing gown, a nice shower, fresh fluffy socks and a hot cup of tea! Where once I would have drowned my sorrows in that cup of tea, tonight I am smiling because I know its ‘the little things’ that should and do count the most.

I have so much to be happy for. My wonderful husband, our amazing dog, my loving family and friends, the generosity of strangers who have helped with my medical fund, a relatively successful blog and related social media links, my talents have gotten rusty but I can get them back if I just try even one new thing every day.

Anyone can achieve anything if they just try and thats alright with me!”

A big thank you to Lette for taking part in our Friday Feelings blog.

Do you relate to Lette’s entry? Do you find joy in achieving what most people would take for granted in being able to do? Comment below and let us know what you thought of Lette’s entry.

Want to write your own Friday Feeling entry?

Send

A high res photo

A short paragraph about yourself

What illnesses you have

Your diary entry with the following topics in it:

It’s Friday, many people will go out tonight for a few sociable drinks with their friends. What do you do on a typical Friday night?
How are you feeling at this moment about your chronic illness?
How do you feel about the future in regards to your illness?
How do you feel about the way people view your illness?

and links to your blog and social media to evienevin87@yahoo.ie

Be sure to put “Friday Feelings” in the subject bar.

So until Sunday

Z.M

x